Trails of the wandering Wolf

I don’t know what I am going to write… As usual. I am mostly confused whether I should talk to myself or to someone else. I have these urges of spending time with other people. But, at the same time there are barely any people I like spending time with. I over-think things, because that is the only way I can create enough noise to change my mood as soon as things get dark. That, and because I’m compulsively creative (for the same purpose). I am purely reflective. i.e. I am versatile to get into any role a person or situation demands. But this versatility is also damaging to my identity. I suffer from basic problems like not knowing what I like or dislike. I cannot do those, “Quick! Tell me what you want to do right now!” kind of games. While most people lose all layers and dig out their identity after that statement, I go blank. Because I do not want anything. I have no desires in life, nor aim, nor purpose. And hence, no ambition. I can pick up a piece of paper on the street because...

With Fear and dread overcome, Moments dampening my spirit. There is a brand new world Made for me but I ain't in it. These roles that I choose And the masks that I wear Ripping holes; I stagger confused As I'm slowly stripped bare. Shadows and silhouettes, Shifting me like I'm broken. I can't find my heart Though I'm torn open. I cry not for shame, I guess Because shame's just a token, A mark, to show the mess That you can expiate, once spoken. In a lucid dream I lay, Not sleeping, nor awakened. A suspended immortality Not living, nor dead.

A crystal bead of a million hues, Awakening to calls Of a boundless tune. Slipping and falling to forces unknown. Pulling and striving for a glimpse At the strings and rays of a breaking dawn. A sight so satisfying, so clear and united Surrender manifesting, bowing blades of green. Ready, now, to answer. Leaping in faith. Alone in its descent, in a solitary existence. Swirls of gray, forming A sky full of wishes. Unanimous in surrender; Beads of a million hues. Awakening from slumber; Uniting rain and solitude.

1. If you can define freedom, it's not really freedom, is it? 2. A child's curiosity is insatiable... The day it is satiated, is the beginning of adulthood and it's the most disheartening thing to see. 3. Books are like glass... They show you your magnificent reflection when there is darkness outside and show you the beautiful outside when there is darkness inside. 4. If you want to know the truth in any religion, ask the "big guys" what they consider sacrilege. 5. It's no wonder that silence resonates with us; well, figuratively speaking. It is after all the body's natural state... 6. Funnily enough, you don't have to be happy to help someone else find happiness... Although, in the process you might accidentally find something that makes you happy... 7. We are brought into conditions unwillingly, become situations obliviously and then shape conditions unknowingly. What you do today does change the world, whether you want it or not. 8. ...

A zealous gust, feathers a-ruffling; Eyes closed in silence, listening. Whispers of life, yet far from realising We're all but one, no matter where we're flying. Looking below, a depthless abyss. Memories of the sun's soft, warm kiss... We take the fall, drop into a glide and miss Traps and thorns revealing nostalgic vivids...

Crawling out of the obscure darkness, Seeping into your brain. Hints and waves of sharpness; Of thunder and orchestrated rain. Crashing, then receding An ecstatic hold on souls. Surrendering and tapping As it rushes from brain to soles... Tickling and thumping With every rise and fall. A world of beats syncing, Melding into a united call. Calling, pulling you deeper within Swirls of ancient calls Hidden and sunken beings Awakening and returning the calls. And every light and hue Of earth and seas and all A symphony growing and spreading; Infecting and uniting them all...

Never date a dreamer He’ll take you on a journey into his world, A world of hidden hues and exotic blooms. You will see the world in but a grain of sand; Time will stop and you won’t see the hand. Never date a dreamer He will sway your mind… His conviction turns dreams into reality. A reality so infectious, It trails the world behind. Never date a dreamer His thoughts make fiction less stranger. His eyes fail to look But gaze through and see all that is And all that will ever be. Never date a dreamer You may understand him. Because he wants you to Though to most he seems distant Because they fail to see that fickle route…

Kinaare bandhi naav Halki si lehrati si. Yaad karti un toofano ko Jo de gaye yaad bhare ghaav Kinaare bandhi naav Chhupe dardo ko sehlati si Saavan chale dhup jale Saanse thami wo naav... Palatti duniye ke Din se raat milati wo shaam Machliyan choome badan Yaad dilati wo bhare ghaav Kinaare bandhi naav Sehlati lehro ko, bikharte ret me Hawaon ke geet sunti Bas yaadein ginti woh naav...

Kick off your shoes And walk on the ground, Stony or smooth, Just circle around. Shove aside Those notes and issues; Hang back your head And look to the moon. Wonders so simple, So little so trivial. And yet so large They renew the soul. Sounds of laughter Shattering windows. Opening doors To untreaded roads. How do we get so confused? Weighted and staggering with The darkening of hearts. Unbearable silence that tears us apart. Like gears in the sand Or tears in the rain. Insignificance devouring Feeding off joys and pain. Make no mistake, Both feelings're so true. Helping each other Clearing their dues. If only you'd stop And listen those tunes; Those whistling winds And life's conduits. Maybe we are just Sparks and dews. Yearning to reunite Forsaking all dues...

Love with an open heart, Wounds and wonders combined. Life will sever and drive apart Revealing madness in the sanest minds The darkness transforms into swerving shades That come and go before they fade. Figure lined up along the wall Tempting, teasing , making you sprawl. You give in. Trying to fill that hole. The absence taunts you. Claws at your guts. Birthing a new person in you. It drives you insane And yet you strive on. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. The cliche you pretend to have never heard. And you walk barefeet on those nails. You awaken and see the shroud Being pulled over your eyes, You remember those fires that you tried Putting off with ice. You scream and drive yourself crazy. Shutting off all that noise that creaks like A parasite. Gnawing and scratching at you from the inside. You fall asleep. Oblivious to the din. Plunging in the darkness. That comforting darkness, And the silence you so crave...

Why is it so hard to be a good person? Is it because we do not know the meaning of good? Maybe if we weren’t taught that praying to God is a good thing, to serve him is good and so on. Kids are always more receptive then adults. As we grow older, we develop a thicker skin. Always viewing anything new with a scepticism to avoid getting hurt or to avoid getting mocked. As kids, it’s easy to believe. Being exposed to “religion” at this time can be extremely damaging. We learn the definition of “good” and “bad” from a relative point of view and once you learn this, you wouldn’t want to learn something again. Would you? As we grow up, we start seeing the meaning of these two words in a different light. However we reject it and refuse to look at it because that voice in your head says, “C’mon, I already know that stuff. This is just someone trying to test me.” No, it is not a test. It’s just life. Things just happen. Plain and simple. You can choose to get involved, or stay out of it. ...

I feel no breeze, nor scorching sun Unweathered, I face the storms and rain. Fear has left me, so's sorrow As they shoveled in the mud and grain. I witness tales of reminiscent woes As whispered under hues of blue and gray Fading into sounds of bees and birds As they alight on my nameless grave Time seems still and yet it flows As the "constant" unfolds in "constant change" No tears nor words now seem to stir me As I begin to ascend from my nameless grave...

That whiplash when you see that funny-man in the movie, the one with that gentle smile and an open heart the one who seems as vulnerable and has a core as delicate as yours and you just want to hug him... And you realize that you are not that young boy anymore and that man has passed on... #RobinWilliams

Life is like a box of chocolates... Some nuggets are bitter, some sweet. Some spicy like the Lindt chili dark chocolates. They are challenging but you can't resist that tempting, exotic cocoa. You want to stop savoring that unpredictable flavor and that well remembered aroma of dark, hypnotic chocolate when you think you've had enough or when you taste a flavor that you find unappealing. Yet, you continue digging. Hoping to find that one flavor that you'd remember forever. That one flavor you'd never want fading away...

http://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2014/07/18-struggles-of-having-an-outgoing-personality-but-actually-being-shy-and-introverted/

Do you want to feel as powerful as an ocean and as calm as one? Close your eyes and breathe. As you breathe in the oncoming wave, you will feel the might of the immense expanse of the ocean become you. And like the ocean, when you exhale, you'll become calm with the returning wave. You have the power of sinking the world or making it wonder looking upon its beauty and serenity... Ruroini Okami

Something’s gone but I don’t know what. I searched a lot, Upturned stones, travelled far and yet it seems gone. I don’t know what. I had it then. I need it now. I need to feel. I need to know. But it’s gone, I don’t know where. I hear these worldly sounds And feel like I’m coming around. Blurry eyes look to the past. Slow walks in the sunset that seemed too fast. These resonances that shake my heart Reminding me of what I’ve missed. Drowning me in the pool again, Leaving me there to reminisce. As I brace the songs of these new winds I open my eyes and walk again. Slow walks in the sunset... Now alone. I feel the breeze again.

I remember a time when all I would dream of is to be a “know-it-all”. Of course, now it sounds ridiculous, but not because of the obvious reasons that come to mind. In my journey to accomplish this long forsaken dream of mine I realized at one point that the more you know, the number of people able to comprehend you dwindle down to endangerment. Once a guy with immense amount of patience and sensitivity, I now find myself irked at even the smallest of instances or completely indifferent to some delicate ones. The first reaction owed to the rare, misnamed commodity called “common sense” growing rarer and unnecessary dramatization of small things by people lacking common sense responsible for the latter reaction. It truly is a curse to be intelligent in this world. You reach an age where your parents ask you, “Found a girl yet?” And you reply by saying, “No Mom, I first want to land a good job, then I’ll think about it.” The fact is, ...

How can you control this force? It resonates through every fibre of your body Shakes your core and pulls you awake. It's like an explosion of pure energy. You cant control it. It owns you as it has owns every other thing. All existence moves with its flow As one divine creation Greater than any religion, More intoxicating than any drug. You suddenly feel like you are the world, Just as the world is you. You can no more tell the known from unknown As the music courses your body Controlling it, convincing you to surrender. You let go... Just as you sink in this sea of bliss... Posted via Blogaway

I want to love you, but I Dont know what to tell you When I try to look at the past It looks like an endless expanse. I dont remember what it felt like I dont remember the love nor the pain I pushed so hard that I stumbled and fell. Now I want to climb up but how can I When I'm already up again. You say you'd do anything to make it work. I feel sorry for you, Because you said it with so much conviction. But I dont know how to respond You say you can do anything to get me back I hope you can... All I remember is a distant past when I felt I was happy despite the pain I was alive and I want to feel that again. You told me that I taught you so much, Maybe I did it for a time like this. A time When it would be me Who would need to be taught again. Posted via Blogaway